Hard-wired for problem-solving…

The June 24, 2013 issue of Woman’s World magazine offered tantalizing feel good/look good snippets. A paragraph on page 4 indicated that “men’s brains are not wired to pick up on the subtle facial clues that reveal how others are feeling”…This segued my brain to an oldie-goldie song that made #1 on the “Billboard charts” in 1954. Penned and published in 1953 by Edith Lindeman and Carl Stutz, it was made famous by songstress Kitty Kallen.

A part-time career many years ago found me playing easy-listening drums and singing pretty melodies, in harmony with my musician husband who was a professional pianist and composer in his own right. I still have a notebook of hand printed lyrics and several sheaves of Murray Graham’s arrangements and harmonies for duets! Among those is a wistful favourite which I think every woman would find inspiration in from time to time.

“Little Things Mean a Lot” is plaintiff and heart-wrenching…”Throw me a kiss from across the room, say I look nice when I’m not, Touch my hair as you pass my chair, Little Things Mean a Lot”.  The melody is easy to hum and the lyrics are as meaningful now as then.

In this day and age of hurry-hurry, 24/7, on-the-go incessantly and hardly a second to catch one’s breath, the Woman’s Day item concludes that all we have to do is “tell him how/what we’re feeling and what would make us feel better.” Sounds simple, but not consoling!

Who’dathunkit…..scientific studies indicate that men’s brains are wired to be problem solvers. 

It All Adds Up...

It all adds up…

There are more than 40 organized real estate boards in Ontario whose members provide ongoing support to the Realtors Care Foundation. The Foundation’s website Intro states that ”Bricks make a building solid, just as a house is built one brick at a time, our Foundation helps those in need.”

The REALTORS Care Foundation supports shelter-related charities in Ontario. Shelter is defined as a refuge, haven or protection that provides or improves quality of life from hunger, the elements, physical/psychological abuse, disabilities and illness.

Donations to the REALTORS Care Foundation make a real difference, supporting people and communities, changing the lives of those who rely on organizations that offer warmth, comfort and safety.

See for yourself the good works.. www.realtorscareontario.ca/

Also close to my heart is the Royal LePage Shelter Foundation, which set a new fundraising records in support of women’s shelters across Canada. This is the largest public foundation dedicated exclusively to supporting women’s shelters and violence prevention and education.

Through salespeople’s commission donations and the fundraising activities of the Royal LePage network, over $14 Million had been raised.

Check out their website for details…

http://www-c.royallepage.ca/about-us/shelter-foundation/

If you missed our Canada-wide Annual garage sale held in May, 2013, ask your local REALTOR® what events are scheduled in the coming months.

I am a proud supporter of both efforts all year, every year!

It all adds up!

Zip lining…

I was musing recently about the devil-may-care attitudes that some people profess - seeming to care naught a fig for the consequences of self-indulgent whims.

Para-sailing, scuba diving, spelunking or even hot-air balloon rides may be considered “dangerous” to one’s well being because of the possible risks; versus probabilities.  Young people and some not-so-young can readily being observed as either daring and fun or downright foolish! It all depends on one’s point of view.

Moving through the different stages of adulthood, sometimes our personal perspective alters. We may think from time to time – “who cares” if I do this or that. Responsibilities can lie heavy on one’s shoulders, and we observe an activity from afar but don’t participate in case something goes awry.

Designated beneficiaries of life insurance policies for example would be disappointed if their inheritance should fall through because the policyholder was stupid and negated the coverage by not adhering to the disciplines set out in small print. Choosing to take a chance could be costly, or not.

Travel photos of acquaintances who are “old enough to know better” are tangible memories of memorable holidays. Rainforest hikes, whitewater adventures, careening down a bobsled run or diving from high cliffs all prompt oohs and ahhs – it looks like such fun!

I have an uncle who, at the age of ninety-nine, was photographed gleefully propelling down a water slide. What of it – it was a blast – and impressive as well!

Selected and accomplished feats are indeed memorable – though a conservative interpretation could be that life is a ride anyway!

On my bucket list though, is to go zip lining!  

On The Run...

I recently saw a posting on www.facebook.com™ of a woman who decided to take up running as a hobby within the past few years. This gal has made new friends and effectively has found her stride in a new lifestyle. Her post noted that she had signed up for her first marathon. 

I was thinking about how she has effectively set her sites on accomplishing a task that may not have been in the scheme of things just a few years ago. When raising a family, mothers are often the “go-to” person, especially if we were raised in a traditional 1950-60’s household where “Mom was the heart of the home and Dad was the head”. 

In a different season of adult life, there’s often a shift to thoughtfulness about making or taking more time for ourselves. An empty-nest seems to create a void that must be filled now that daily tasks and responsibilities may be reduced. 

It happens too often that ill health or other concerns come into one’s sphere, perhaps parents or spouse on one hand, and our children on the other. Any flicker of resentment is quelled then as we step again into the shoes of responsibility. Mine fit too comfortably – in fact I seldom take them off! 

If your shoes are run down at the heels, need to be buffed up, and sole savers applied, maybe it can be refreshing to take a different point of view. I realized with a wide smile that the now-single lady with a new lifestyle has just switched her footwear!  

When there seem to be still too few hours in the day and the list of Things to Do seems longer, I’m  now wearing imaginary spandex, layered tops under a sweatshirt, and sturdy shoes to both feel the part and perform the task of being “on the run”.

 

Unsung Heroes and Heroines…

Too frequently a family member, friend, neighbour or others we know are diagnosed with a serious ailment. That “news travels fast” is an understatement, and despite pleas for privacy - everyone is a-buzz.

Well-meaning offers of assistance, advice, carefully spoken encouragements or even probing questions can be nearly overwhelming!

After the proverbial dust settles and people are no longer so attentive, a routine may develop which involves a spouse or other caregiver from dawn to dusk, as well as interrupted sleep through the night to meet the needs of a loved one or patient who is unwell.

The prognosis may not be a guarded opinion or clearly terminal, there are many situations where caregivers toil courageously over long periods of time, the commitment seldom eases. Children may have any number of debilitating conditions and require ongoing attention and assistance; victims of accident might find their lives and lifestyle turned topsey-turvy; parents or partners may develop dementias; others may suffer the cruelty of incurable relentless conditions.

While television, print media and support-group efforts create an awareness not previously learned, until people walk in someone else’s moccasins as a selfless caregiver, there is only surmise, not knowing.

In-home caregiver family members can hardly participate in an exciting conversation about trivia or fun, the row they hoe is long, winding and fraught with challenges. A quick trip to the grocery store for food basics must be scheduled, time-frame predictable, and with backup in place!

Courageous men, women and children are all around us, seldom complaining – just doing what needs to be done. When we hear a radio account, view a television documentary or news clip, or read a magazine article about the intricacies of managing the task loads and keeping a steady hand on the tiller – let us be grateful for our own good fortunate and send good thoughts to the unsung heroes we may know of, haven’t yet met, or will never meet.

When The Going Gets Tough...

I think it’s probable that we have all found ourselves in the disconcerting situation where a friend or relative is faced with bereavement, job loss, divorce, or illness – to name just a few identified major life stressors.

We are usually quick to say “what can I do to help”, or, “if there’s anything you need, call me”. Even the most generous hearts and minds can feel stymied when it comes to stepping forward, perhaps with a hand up or a hand out. It’s sometimes awkward to find the right words, or worse – trepidation about saying something that will sit inappropriately.

If the response is stilted, it’s easier to back away rather than hold fast in our offer – probably the recipient of our goodwill is just as uncertain as we are! I love and treasure the sensitivity of this quote by Martin Luther King, Jr…

”The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.”

Regardless of our personal opinions or convictions on disputable subjects, striving to retain our integrity and strength of character by not making unsolicited comments will always hold us in good stead. In this unrelenting world of work, busyness, socializing and family, it’s easy to get caught up in our own activities.

When you hear of someone who is struggling through mire, telephone or write a note and follow through.

Imagine how thrilled the recipient will feel when the going gets tough!

It's a crapshoot...

I had the pleasure yesterday of attending a matinee performance of the 1950 Broadway musical Guys and Dolls which was performed at the Algonquin theater in Huntsville. A wonderful production and many in the audience humming along to familiar melodies and lyrics!

Being of more recent vintage, I found myself recognizing crooned tunes such as “I’ll Know”, “If I Were a Bell”, “My Time of day”, and “I’ve Never Been in Love Before”. The freshness and wonder of new love likely touched everyone in the audience!

The ongoing ups and downs of Adelaide and her fiancé Nathan Detroit hold true in today’s world – some things never change! A few quiet giggles and murmurings as people there related personally to the throes of romance.

Sinatra made “Luck be a Lady Tonight” his signature song! Whether we peer through rose-coloured glasses, swoon with anticipation or, conversely, are more matter-of-fact; love and loving can sometimes feel too fickle!

Whether the subject is gambling either with cards or your heart, “it’s a crapshoot”!